So, last year I believed I would be married next week…
I finally voiced that, out loud for the first time to anyone but you
It looks so naive, so foolish now… to believe. 
But I think some time I’ll be healing
That aside… I’m starting to stop blaming everything but you for why you left.
You left me because you wanted to.
If someone wants something they won’t look for an excuse
From now on…
I don’t blame my  best friend 
I don’t blame your best friend
I don’t blame my Grandmother
I don’t blame my Brother 
I don’t blame my Father
I don’t blame your Mother 
& I won’t blame your Father
No matter what the circumstances surrounding us
No matter what the people surrounding us said or did
No matter if I made mistakes, was afraid and unsure
No matter what your reasons where… and I may never know

One thing I do know, you chose to make your choice
No outside circumstances can, at the end of the day 
be the thing we turn to when we need something to blame
No matter if every world we’ve known falls down around us
Even in the midst of this, we make the choice 
For commitment or freedom
Love of someone else or love of self
To stay or to walk away

This may cure me, finally seeing, nothing else is to blame
for your words, 
for your actions
for your choice
We just use those things we blame 
to work towards the escape we had planned anyway

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